and i'm spent

which according to urban dictionary means: having shared your time or money on a situation, may be used to express one's frustration in a negative manner or as positive to reflect satisfaction.

that definition is an accurate description of how i feel from last week. after finishing up a 50+ hour work week ~ i’ve come to realize that i am seriously not cut out to work full-time. not only have i been cranky, and have suffered from headaches all week, i am beyond exhausted and almost ill from working so much - needless to say i am quite glad for that to be done. you can read the back-story here.. .. ..

i wonder then.. .. .. . do you ever feel that having reached the end of your busy week, you also might wonder what the point of it all is? perhaps you’re juggling with studies and work, or work and family, or multiple projects and goals. maybe you have a nagging sense that there’s something wrong or that your priorities are a bit skewed ~ and you keep promising yourself that you’ll be less busy next week/month/year. but, here’s the problem, you always seem to be busy.

sadly, for some people, this is the norm.

the lyrics from the song, “i’m in a hurry” by alabama really helps to put things into a clearer perspective:
I’m in a hurry to get things done
Oh I rush and rush until life's no fun
All I really gotta do is live and die
But I'm in a hurry and don't know why

and so, for those who work full-time, i have a couple of questions; one ~ how do you do it? and two ~ perhaps the better question to ask is WHY?

and yet, the question we should not be asking each other is do you work? but should be are you employed? just because i am not employed does not mean that i do not work.

i find it a bit hard to understand women who work full-time when it’s not out of necessity. i also get really steamed when society has deemed me unworthy because i do not {well after today, i won‘t} work out of the home. i’ll even find myself getting defensive when i explain that i do not work outside the home, or i’ll joke around and say that i am a ‘kept-woman’.

i am worthy. just as i am. i don’t have to do anything spectacular, or be anything fabulous or say anything profound or fix anything to have worth. parts of my life are not perfect and yes i have made mistakes and done things “wrong”. i have value just as i am. no changes needed, no bad feelings warranted and i will need to accept me if i want anyone and everyone to do the same.

blessings