A new month

As I turned over the calendar, today, to the new month, there was that one moment, when all I felt was deep apprehension.

Why?

mmhm good question.

I really do love the 1st day of each month! It's a chance at a fresh start ... again! Too often I get caught up in the fact that new chances or changes can only happen on New Year's Day. It makes me think that I have to stay in the mould or rut I am in because it's not a ‘new year’, only a new day. But that's just it isn't it. It IS a NEW day. We're given a fresh chance everyday to become a better person than we were the day before.  It seems like only yesterday we were on the brink of summer with its slower schedules, warmer weather, and now, here we are already halfway through it.

While we still had kids at home this time of year meant spending our days; playing outdoors, biking, going to the park or to the beach, having campfires, sleepovers, staying up late, bbq dinners, enjoying min-vacations - like Marineland without being governed to the rhythm of a clock.

How quickly the years go by.

We no longer have kids living at home and therefore no one will be heading back to school, resulting in no need to go back to school shopping, nor do we have to get back into the routines of, well, routine. Since I am no longer employed my days won't change a whole lot, and yet. ..

Why then, this apprehension .. . …

This summer was quite different from the previous ones. With the decline in my health I was limited to what I could do and knew that I needed to slow my life down even more. So I took more time to sit, more time to rest, spent a lot of time reading and soaking up the sun, made simpler meals, accepted help from others and learned to let the little things go. .. ..

It takes me time ~ a lot of time ~ to put these ideas together. I typically need uninterrupted space, for hours, to really sort things out and put them together and string words into phrases and meanings.

Me? I love writing. I love reading. I absolutely adore being home, by myself, with my computer, rationalizing and thinking and mulling over ideas and pieces. But lately, I've been struggling with the way I define myself.

“Live in each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit,
and resign yourself to the influence of the earth.”
~ Henry David Thoreau

Time passes by so quickly, so enjoy each of the moments you find yourself in because one day it will just be another memory. Change happens all around us everyday; we can either embrace it or reject it, it’s up to us.

Blessings