FINE

I’m fine - thank you very much!!!
 
'I'm fine': 1) the more polite way to say, ‘no, get lost.’ 2)The general response to any question asking how you are doing or feeling. – Urban Dictionary

The ability to lie is a liability. – Unknown

It’s more work to make something up than just tell it as it is, we only lie about things important enough to hide.  I’ve told lies to hide poor choices. I’ve told lies to hide strong feelings. I’ve told lies to avoid conflict. I’ve told lies to escape punishment.

But if I care enough about them to lie about it, what does that say about me?

Maybe it says that I hate people thinking I’m irresponsible. Or that I hate being embarrassed. Perhaps it means that I hate making other people angry. More than that, I hate the consequences of doing the wrong thing.

Our lies may reveal more about us than our confessions.

So what do we do with that great big lie we all tell each other? You know, the one where we say,

I’m fine….?
 
People we know pass us in the grocery store and say fancy meeting you here! They ask us how we’re doing.

What do we say?

I’m fine. I’m good. I’m great.
 
It’s easier than the loaded version, after all, and shorter. If we really want to sell it then we crack a smile and say

I couldn’t  be better.

 And we turn it back on them.

But how are you?

We continue this dance until one side judges the other to be trusted with a little bit more of the truth. And even then we use the old saying, this is just between you and me. 

Almost all relationships begin this way – though perhaps not in grocery stores. Some begin at playgrounds, or malls, while walking or eating dinner. Some are forged by going through something terrible together. But most interactions never get this far, because we’re so busy sticking to our massive, collective lie of I’m fine.

I’m going to tell you the truth. The truth, truth.

I’m not fine.

I like to think I can handle things on my own. I like to tell other people, don’t worry about me, I’m okay. But that’s not always the truth. At least, it’s not always the whole truth.

Apparently, I can’t do this. At least, I can’t do it alone.

The thing is, none of us can.

Those of us who tell the truth know this.

But we often fail to live it.

I’m not sure I trust myself enough to let go, yet. But I’m learning that -

sometimes, the lie of I’m fine is far more risky than the truth of I’m not so fine, 
and sometimes, just telling someone I’m not fine gives you smiles enough to say… 
I’m fine, 
and still be telling the truth. 

I did that this week. I put down that backpack of I can do this.

Turns out its not a one-person job to carry anyways.

FINE - an acronym for freaked-out, insecure, neurotic, emotional
 
So tell me, how are ya?

Blessings