Happily Ever After

Growing up I have fond memories of watching the Disney Classics like Snow White, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, and many others. 

As our kids came along we added the newer movies to our repertoire, like The Littlest Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin and so on. 

And when I am sick theses are the movies I turn to.  They help me pass the many hours sitting on the couch trying to get better.  But, have you ever noticed that each movie had the same type of story line?  That good triumphs over evil, the heroine always gets the prince and of course they always live happily ever after.

However; happily ever after doesn’t look like the movies, nor does it look like the fairy tales.  Happily ever after is not being swept off my feet without a care in the world, having my every need met without ever speaking a word. Happily ever after is when I express my needs not expecting others to guess them. Happily ever after is when we both put in the time, the communication, the thoughtfulness, the work. 

But mostly, happily ever after is what I choose to make of my circumstance.

How about you? Are living in your happily ever after?

Blessings

ass~u~me

The thing about women is that we always assume the girl next door, the women across the aisle, the mom with the baby-on-board sign, your husband’s best friend’s wife, your cousin, great aunt or the stranger in the dressing room next to you at the mall has it figured out.

Whether “it’s” how to balance motherhood, or how to manage her temper or style her hair or stock her fridge or connect with her husband or make new friends, or well, anything else really. We’re always certain we’re the only one who feels awkward or incompetent or left out or frumpy or you-name-it.

We been attending a new church for the past several months now, and I wondered if I was the only one who felt squirmy awkward in her skin during the “shake each others hands and greet someone” section of the worship service; that we have on most Sundays.   After all, my thinking was that we’re new and shouldn’t they be making us feel welcome.   And I sort of thought God might be nudging me to do something about it.

I resisted for a good long time.    

And then one day after church I found myself walking over and signing up for a Ladies Bible study.

Oh boy! ~ what have I gone and done now.. .. .. . I have huge anxiety walking in to a room alone where everyone else knows each other and I am new and don’t really know a soul and then I have to find a place to sit… and. ..  gah!

But lo and behold, it’s never, no never as bad as I imagine it to be.  I over assume things and end up scared out of my mind.  Getting to know each other can be hard and perhaps a little uncomfortable ~ but I’m learning that making friends doesn’t happen overnight or even over a handshake at church. 

So when I meet new women now I’m over assuming that they’ve got it all figured out. Especially the friend part.

I know now, that maybe all I have to do is ask and there’ll be a new friend waiting on the other side of the question.   

Blessings

Time and again

I read a quote recently that said, “The more you are doing, the less well you are doing most, if not all, of it.”

Over-activity is one area of life where “less” is truly “more”.

You may THINK you can do it all, but reality says, you can’t. Superwoman does not live here and chances are, she doesn’t live at your house either. Why can’t we get it all done? Because we live, breath, and work within the confines of something over which we have no control. That one thing in life is that which no matter who we are, where we come from, or what we do, we’re all given the exact same amount of.

TIME.

You can’t buy more of it, you can’t earn it, you can’t control it, you can’t make it go by faster, you can’t make it go by slower, you can’t make it stop, you can’t erase it, you can’t multiply the hours within it. The seconds tick away to minutes and minutes into hours. We live within it’s limitation of 24 hours a day. Period.

Time is guaranteed to no one. The only control you will ever have over it ~ is what you fill it with.

Each moment we get in life is a gift. 

 As I’ve grown older I have come to appreciate Time more. What I am slowly realizing is that I need to spend my time consciously and with thought. I need to carve time out of my day for the important things. Laughter. Fun. Making memories with the people I love. I need to dedicate time to the things that matter most to me. Not in yesterday or last year or too much in tomorrow. But right now. Because really, right now is all that we’ve got.

The truth is ~ we only have one chance at this life. Don’t let the world tell you how to spend such a priceless gift. Don’t waste your time worrying about what other people think of you, or living under the expectations of others.

Ask God first. He may have better ideas for you. After all, He’s the giver of your every day. He’s the one who created the day and night, the months, and years. He’s the one who dreamed up the seasons. He’s the one who knew the moment you would take your first breath. He’s the one who knows the moment you will take your last.

Psalm 90:12 {New Living Translation (NLT)}
“Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom”.

Time seems to fly by so fast. But in truth ~ time is nothing but steady and consistent. Seconds into minutes, minutes into hours and hours into days.

Our time is precious ~ we need to use it wisely.

Blessings

Talkin' to Myself

I have conversations with myself all the time. Not out -loud- people- look- at- me -weird - because- I -am- talking -to -myself -conversations; but inside my head conversations. Often I am like my own therapist, asking myself questions and then thinking on them awhile before answering ~ myself. The talking to myself part probably stems from thinking too much.

There are times though that I wish I could invent an On/Off switch that could be implanted in my head, as I would love to just shut my brain off and relax once in awhile. But until that happens, I am left with my thoughts and my deep philosophical conversations with myself.

My thoughts tend to be like a movie montage. Scrolling along until my subconscious reaches up and plucks one down. By spending time talking with ourselves, we are ultimately helping ourselves sort through the stuff. 

Talking through them, either in your own head or even out loud as I’ve also been known to do while I walk solitary down the country road, 

 can help us with dealing with past hurts and lead to healing.

Learning to let things go is something that that little voice inside my head often whispers to me, let it go. 

Just. Let. It. Go. 

I can not do anything to change the past, but I sure as heck do not have to carry it with me to the future.  You see it's all {my past, present and future} part of an intricate plan. Sure there will be more life lessons and probably some hard times ahead and from time to time I need to myself of this: Jeremiah 29:11 {New International Version (NIV)}“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

And as long as I trust in the One who has my future planned, I’m in good hands.

You are too! Remember that.

Blessings

One Word

As you are picking your phrases, your resolutions, your one words, your goals for 2013, I hope your families and friends are an encouragement to you.

As you consider what this year will hold, consider also this:
What does your life hold right now?
Who do you want to be?
What character trait do you want to intentionally develop?
How do you want to live your life?

In my own personal resolution revolution, I started choosing just One Word to focus on all year.

Just One Word, because that's easy to remember all year long. I'll even place visible reminders of it around my home and workspace, helping to keep my word before me. It’s become a spiritual discipline of sorts.

This is my second year choosing One Word and I want it to stand as a touchstone: a reminder not of what I need to do, but of who I want to be.

It becomes the filter through which I make decisions; the home-base to which I return when I’m unsure which way to go. It forces clarity and helps me concentrate my efforts, energy, and time on intentional growth.

It’s a simple concept, but not an easy one. My One Word has always been a challenge more than a comfort.  It's like a pebble in my shoe ~ and unavoidable nuisance, a constant nudge, a discomfort that coause me to walk differently.

There’s love/hate relationship that I have with my One Word ~ and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I figure if it doesn’t scare me at least a little, it’s probably not the right word.

Will you join me?
Quiet your heart and see what word rises to the surface.

Let’s focus this year not on doing more, but on being who we were created to be.

Blessings

Pair of Nines

I sit here
solemn and quiet with no music or laughter filling this space.
No more Christmas lights twinkle
giving us a delicate reminder of what’s to come.
Everything was put away yesterday.
 
And it’s quiet.

I’m not feeling great
and wonder if I should stay at home today
but then I shake my head
to clear that thought
and say
Suck it up! Charge Ahead!

I try
to suck it up
to do the daily routine
to meet expectations
I must try to function
or at least pretend
Does anyone see through me?

My insides scream
“I can’t function!”
Yet here I am.

Juggling everything that’s needed to maintain what you call a normal life,
knowing deep inside me that
I. Just. Can’t.
I can’t do it all and you know what?
Neither should you.

We all have our own set of limitations
a set of cards we’ve been dealt to live with
and while I've been given a pair of nines,

you're holding a royal flush 
making there no way for me to compete against you.

But
God is here
always up for a chat
and He loves me
exactly as I am
exactly this minute
and He sits with me
and comforts me.

And in a few moments
or maybe a day or two
it just might
be better.

So I sit
knowing that today
“The Lord is my shepherd;
I have all that I need.
Psalm 23: 1 {New Living Translation}

Blessings

Authentic

It is that time of year when folks are doing two things. {Well, three things, but we aren’t going to discuss overeating during the holidays…}

The first is lamenting everything they didn’t get done this year. To that I say, time spent regretting time wasted is just more time wasted. {No, that quote isn’t original with me.} My take on things undone is to briefly take stock, learn from it, and move on.

The other thing folks are doing is thinking about next year and making resolutions. The unending optimists among us will list things like “lose 125 pounds by February 1″, “never eat out all year” and “exercise every day for an hour while only feeding my family completely organic, fresh, non-processed food”. To them I say, phooey on you.

I am so thankful that I am old enough to realize that New Year’s Resolutions are a waste of time.

Now, goals and lists of things we hope to accomplish… are another thing altogether.  As a dedicated list maker, I can buy into that. And since most bloggers are posting their reading lists and project lists for the year… well … last year I decided to do something different! Remember this?

And I’m doing it again only this time my one word for 2013 is authentic and according to dictionary.com it means;
1. not false or copied; genuine; real: an authentic antique,  2. entitled to acceptance or belief because of agreement with known facts or experience; 3. reliable; trustworthy.

I realize this could seem like a bit of a carry over from my 2012 word of honesty. But after much prayer, I  believe God is calling me to live, be and act as authentically as He made to be.  So what does being authentic look like?

Good question.. .

As I begin my year, I wonder, are you willing to journey with me as I figure that out?

Blessings