Trouble sleeping

I've been having trouble sleeping lately. It's not that I am not tired when I go to bed or that I don't always sleep. But I am waking up not rested.

I am dreaming so much through the night. Most of which I do not remember. Other than to wake up thinking 'how weird was that'. I wonder why we dream. I know that in the Bible dreams were used to convey the message from God. Several different times are mentioned throughout the Bible, however my dreams, are just weird. There doesn't seem to be any message or any connection from one to another, and sometimes I 'll have the same weird dream.

This picture is one of tranquility. Just looking at it brings me peace.


Picture of Peace. That's what I look for. Peace. Perfect Peace. To know that I am where I should be and doing what I was created to do.

So since I cannot sleep, I read, right now I am re-reading the book "The Purpose Driven Life", by Rick Warren. In Chapter 2 titled "You are not an Accident", there is a poem that really helped and continues to help me sort though this maze we call life.

You are who you are for a reason.
You're part of an intricate plan.
You're a precious and perfect unique design,
Called God's special woman or man.

You look like you look for a reason.
Our God made no mistake.
He knit you together within the womb,
You're just what he wanted to make.

The parents you had were the ones that He chose,
And no matter how you may feel,
They were custom designed with God's plan in mind,
And they bear the Master's seal.

No, that trauma you faced was not easy.
And God wept that it hurt you so;
But it was allowed to shape your heart
So that into His likeness you'd grow.

You are who you are for a reason.
You've been formed by the Master's rod.
You are who you are, beloved,
Because there is a God!

How's that for powerful.

Blessings

Sparkle!

Meet Sparkle, my special little friend!
My mom gave this to me for my birthday, I wasn't able to post this picture with the others on the birthday blog, because I hadn't loaded it yet. So this is a little late, but here it is.

It might seem a little silly to some that I received a stuffed toy for my birthday. But you need to understand that I have been collecting Holstein cows ever since Wayne & I were married in 1986. I have stuffed cows, ceramic cows, glass cows, wooden cows, even cows dressed up in clothes. In fact every single room in the house, (except Krystle, Kyle & Darcy's bedrooms) I have a cow of some sort, or maybe even two or three. Each cow in my collection has been given a name, usually to remind me of where or when I got her, or even who gave her to me.

Wayne & I were dairy farmers, up until 1998 when our barn burned down. And even though we no longer have live animals on our farm, I still enjoy to have these critters around. The nice thing with these cows around is we no longer have to enjoy that 'dairy' air. I sure don't miss that.

Since Wayne works as a hired dairy man for Gerry he still gets his share but since he grew up with it, he doesn't mind it quite like I did.

I remember when I used to go visit my Schwartzentruber grandparents on their farm, and whenever I would walk into the barn, I plugged my nose the whole time I was in there. How ironic was it then that I married a dairy farmer.

Blessings

Christmas

Only 49 more days to go. It's so hard to believe that the Christmas season will soon be upon us. Although I guess most stores have started their decorating.
I've been chatting with friends and of course this time of year we tend to ask the old question "Have you started your Christmas shopping yet?" My answer is almost always 'No'.
For years Wayne & I only started shopping at the 1st of December, I have long since broken that tradition. As I was getting too stressed with all the last minute shopping.
However this year as I look at my calendar I realize the weekends are already getting full with dinner's and other events, and I am alarmed to try to figure out when I will start shopping.

Now you might wonder what does this picture have to do with Christmas.

This was the very first doll I received at my first Christmas. I was born in October so I was only 2 1/2 months old at Christmas. My Grandpa & Grandma Kaufman gave this to me. My sister got one the year she was born too. We were never allowed to play with these dolls hence it is still in the box. Growing up it used to bother me, not being allowed to play with it, but now I'm kinda glad. Or it would have been tossed away like all the others. This way I have a tangable reminder of my grandparents. (they have both passed away). It has very sentimental attachment to me.

I had put a few pictures into an album on my facebook account and this happened to be one of them. Underneath the photo I put "This doll was given to me by my Kaufman grandparents, for my First Chirstmas. We both celebrated our 40th birthday this year!" Krystle commented and I quote "this is the creeper doll! :S who you never took out of the box." obviously she doesn't feel the same nostalgia as me. LOL

Blessings

What a View!

This is one of the many photos I have taken with the 'new' camera my kids got me for my birthday.

Tonight I installed the Picture Perfect program so I can upload these photos from my camera to my computer. Krystle would be so proud of me. I was able to do this all by myself. Normally I would wait till she came home or till Gerard could come over. That way I could get them to do it and just show me how it all works rather than try to figure it out on my own. But yeah me, I did it. I have gotten better with the whole techno stuff.

So this photo then was the view from my front door on Tuesday October 30th. Absolutely Breathtaking!

We have had some gorgeous fall days, the warm weather is definitely spoiling us. I had overheard a conversation and these two people were already starting to complain that this weather can only last for so long. Well honestly what do you expect, it is November and we do live in Southwestern Ontario.

I do like the four seasons that we enjoy each year, but if I had to choose one over the others, it would definitely be autumn. This is my most favourite time of the year. It's not freezing like winter, not too mucky like spring and not too hot like summer

I think Autumn is just about as close to perfect for me.

Blessings

Grief

I know this is not one of the most pleasant of topics, however, in this life we all at sometime or another have experienced grief of some kind.

Yesterday, Wayne & I went for our walk, we naturally took both our dogs, however this time, Ace was hit by a car. He was able to get himself off the road, but then just laid in the ditch and bit at us as we tried to help him out. Wayne had to go back and get the truck and a pair of gloves so we could lift Ace into the truck to bring him back home. He just laid there moaning every once in a while. Before we went to bed I had Kyle check on him once more to see if he still had water, and Ace had died.



Kyle was pretty shook up and he was angry. I know that anger is one the many faces of grief, and I am sure we'll have a whole range of emotions as time continues on.
I am sure there are some reading this thinking it's only a dog, but to us he was like family.............
in fact today, when I went for a walk, I found myself looking for him as I would travel along, I really miss him.

So...... to the faithful readers, I would greatly appreciate it if after you read this you would say a prayer on our behalf, knowing that the God of all comfort will meet our needs and help us through this time.

Blessings

40th blog for my 40th birthday

I celebrated my 40th birthday this past Sunday (October 14). Yes I am admitting it.
Anyone who knows me knows that for the past 10 years, I have celebrated my 29th birthday repeatedly. In fact on Sunday, I even got a few wishes for turning 29. Unfortunately I had to correct them.

I struggled for a long time with the whole aging process, I wasn't ready to admit that I was getting older. After hearing that my mom had complimented me to her Ladies bible study group, about how proud she is of me for taking Titus 2:3 to heart I realized that my "age" doesn't change who I am.

I was overjoyed to share my birthday with Wayne, Krystle & Gerard, Kyle & Darcy. I made Thanksgiving dinner with ALL the trimmings. mmhm it was good! We even put candles in the pumpkin pie. The kids all went together and gave me a digital camera for my birthday. I was SO excited!



Wayne gave me these (aren't they gorgeous)


My sister Becky gave me these


I also went the Blue Dragon Tattoo Parlour and got myself this

here is a close up



I was SO nervous, and yes it did hurt (about like a bee sting) and it stayed hot longer, but it was well worth it.

Blessings

Giving of Thanks

We have so many things to be thankful for.

But to just name a few, my Lord Jesus Christ, who, in spite of knowing me, loved me enough to give HIS life for mine.

For Wayne, who loves me unconditionally.

For Krystle, Kyle & Darcy who delight me by just calling me 'Mom'.

My parents, brother & sister, who helped create the family of memories that I have.

My Aunt Ginny & Uncle Ken who opened their home to me when I was a troubled teen, and who allow me to call them 'Ma & Pa.'

For my friends, I cannot possibly name all of you (you know who you are), who inspire me & challenge me & accept me for who I am. 'Thank you'

For the farm and the country life that we are able to raise our family in.

AND the list of items could go on and on,

We have so many things to be thankful for.....
Please consider sharing with me "what is it that you are thankful for?"
I anticipate your response.

Blessings